Many people either don’t know or don’t care that extraterrestrial technology touches everyday human life here on earth. It literally drops out of the sky into the hands of potential exploiters everyday. Private individuals pretty much have the market captured for bringing truly useful xeno-products to the customer. Whether brought here by downed space craft or smuggled in by a disenfranchised alien scientist, here are some tips on how to bring non-terran technology to human markets on earth:

If you don’t understand it, don’t sell it – come on people, didn’t anyone learn from the cloning fiasco in the early ’80s? Alien technology can be understood – you just need to put some effort into it. If the tech you are trying to exploit is beyond you – find an expert to help out. For goodness sake – don’t go out and market that artificial blood unless you have a good understanding of the long-term effects on human DNA.

Transgenics is out – Yes, it was hot a couple of years ago – but the trend is away from human/animal hybrids. There are plenty of medical applications – like pig hearts and such, but stay away from the seasonal entertainment market. Too many parents found that monkey tails on kids for Halloween is real cute, but after a week of cutting holes in jeans… Let’s just say it isn’t very practical. Avoid trans-genetic technology for now.

AI is in – Machine intelligence is fashionable again, but at a price. Supercomputer prices that is. Not to mention the liability insurance. There are whispers of Asimov like “robotic laws”, but don’t believe the hype – AIs are certainly still dangerous to humans, so make certain you can afford the deductible before you bring the next 1024 processor intelligent cluster to market.

Not all Tech is destine for market – Here is the problem: Many alien cultures have way too much invested in technology for vivisection, cattle mutilation and, uh, “probing”. Humans have been on the wrong end of this technology for many centuries already – marketing some technology is just too “sensitive” for the human market at this time.

Don’t Patent – A grey alien’s mother ship breaks up over North America on a Tuesday – sending alien technology raining down on thousands of potential exploiters. Think time to market – you gotta have your xeno-tech derived product on the shelves by that Friday in time for the weekend. You don’t have the time or need to patent. Be honest with yourself – you didn’t create it in the first place! And trust me – the greys have plenty of prior art to blow your patent away.

Be wary of Venture Capital – These guys know their technology inside and out, but they know business even better. Don’t go into a meeting with these vultures hawking the latest tired iteration of a faster than light engine without a solid business plan. They could care less about the reduced space/time rift effects of your technology – they want to know if the management team is up to the task of bringing it to market. Borrow money from family and friends – they are more likely to be impressed by the fact you can go to the moon and back in 1/3 of a second without causing catastrophic ripples in space/time.

“I am from the government and here to help.” – No. Don’t even open the door. They don’t wear black anymore either, so you have to be careful. This is the land of opportunity – don’t let the government get involved. Well, that is until you have unleashed some horrible nanobot plague accidentlly – and then you should blame it on your neighbor. Or your weird uncle on you Mother’s side (by marriage). That is the best way to get the government involved.

So, in the spirit of exploiting that which is not mine – the idea for this post came from ProBlogger Group Writing Project – ‘How To…’ – be sure to visit!  Other project entries to visit are 6 Steps To Writing A Fantasy Blockbuster, How to Bring Art to the Unwashed Masses (good luck!), and How to Make a Rubbish Website (cause I love the word rubbish!).